Last year, I found myself consumed with all things entertaining and instantly gratifying. I was more concerned with getting lost in social media than being attentive to what was going on in my real life at home.
It was a way of escaping the mundane, instead of confronting my anxieties of being a new mama for the fourth time, meeting the needs of my family as well as managing home and family business. Furthermore, the idea of writing to encourage the community of women that took the time to read this blog seemed pointless, since I myself was not embracing my call.
I became entangled in comparing my life to others, vircariously living through family, friends and even strangers lives; and when that wasn’t enough, I found myself becoming resentful and critical of people and the small glimpses of life they chose to share.
This was the start of an unhealthy, addictive behavior I did not want to face nor continue.
This distraction began to show its ugly head in my real life. I was short and impatient with my children speaking to them while I was looking down at my phone. Getting behind on chores, slighty neglecting things like clean laundry. I would began my day anxiously checking my email, social media, responding to blog comments, etc. My life was being controlled by “likes,” “favorites,” “retweets,” etc. while my family was getting my half-hearted efforts.
I had lost focus on what really mattered, for the quick fix of a false reality. Its so easy to become distracted when your heart is filled with so many idols, so many false gods.
I was worshiping:
- The approval of others.
- My own ways, my own rights.
- Love of self.
Sadly my friends, this is the opposite of the life God desires us to live through Christ.
For all that is in the world—the desires of the flesh and the desires of the eyes and pride of life—is not from the Father but is from the world. 1 John 2:16
To avoid our hearts from being pulled away from God, we have to become diligent in protecting it from thoses areas that so easily entangle us. Sometimes its hard to identify the culprits, but if we humbly shift our attention on God, He will show us the very things that are distracting us from His presence.
Humilty + Action Eliminates The Culprits
I began to grow tired of the downward spiral I was creating. I prayed, confessed my wrongs and repented.
Then, I disconnected from social media for a year. Bold move, I know, but it was necessary.
I also deleted my blog. Crazy, right?! After 4 years of writing, creating a positive and encouraging place for women, I completely deleted every single piece of writing. It was heart wrenching, but I was relieved. My mind needed to become clear and free in order to gain clarity of where this blog was going and what God wanted me to do with it.
I had to be willing to give it up, to gain it back with a refreshed, clear understanding of my reason for writing.
Overall, I had to unplug so that I could restore what I had been missing with my family, and most importantly in my relationship with God. I had to be reminded that after God, my home life is my first ministry. At home is where I love, serve and nurture my family.
Unquestionably, they are the priority.
so that they may [a]encourage the young women to love their husbands, to love their children, 5 to be sensible, pure, workers at home, kind, being subject to their own husbands, so that the word of God will not be dishonored. Titus 2:4-5
The awesome thing is that God’s love covers our shortcomings (1 Peter 4:8) and His mercies are new every day (Lamentations 3:22-23). When we slip up, He provides us with the opportunity to turn our hearts back to Him, and the things that truly matter most.
What idols do you need to rid your heart of today?